If attempting last minute with a toddler, pre-schooler, and mini dachshund running circles through your kitchen between your legs, first drink coffee.
Next, give kids any mixing & baking job possible and then distract when it’s time for the messy icing. I recommend cartoons, leapfrog letter magnets, and a toy they haven’t seen in a while.
Now take your white icing and add the only manly color I could find, neon green. Then after realizing that looks yellow and girly and deciding try to change it to neon purple, add neon pink . After some whispered profanities, go ahead and add lots of purple, accompanied by more green. Swirl it around and declare it garnet and gold.
Note to self—buy more food coloring and perhaps some more icing tubes for writing so the manly Nole cake doesn’t have a glittery pink message.